AUTISTIC NICK, ABN’S AND THE ATO

What a month it’s been.

George Calombaris was caught being frustrated with not being able to make one plus one equal 0 on his calculator as he sat staring down at his excel sheet as his coffee cup rested on his galvanised marbled countertop. My advice to George is to buy a coffee club franchise and open it up inside your local Westfield.

Next, we had Barnaby Joyce crying over his yearly wage of $211,00. Poor Barnaby here he is a dad to two kids after having an affair with his media advisor and leaving his family home in New England (NSW) to set up a new home with Vikki Campion.

His other four children were staying put at home with his ex-waiting for Barnaby to pay for the necessities in life.

His ex-wife rather than eating her feelings by consuming her weight in various forms of junk food, took to the gym and now is competing and winning body building competitions.

Lastly Andrew Bolt attacks a 16-year-old Autistic climate change activist because driven by the fact that newspapers aren’t the money- making business that they once were, he is now paid to write his vile opinionated pieces in order to drive web traffic to the newspaper that he works for website.

And as you would expect the outrage began to pour out, but was Andrew worried? In a word no.

Because that what they pay him for to provoke outrage and shock, because they cannot rely on news stories bringing in people to subscribe to their website and so under the banner of ‘free speech’ they let Andrew write what he likes because all they’re concerned with it bringing in the dollars and making the headlines. Which is off course exactly what occurred.

But what’s happened in my week well read on and find out..

MONDAY

Monday is like Kelly Osbourne un-interesting and unwelcomed. You can feel Monday lingering in the background on Sunday night, it knows it’s an unwelcomed visitor but nevertheless it hangs about like a bad smell. Monday why do you exist? I haven’t got the time and energy to work this out it just is what it is. The ATO (Australian Tax Office) I recently had to telephone them and spend a delightful 45-minutes listening to and answering questions about an ABN enquiry. An ABN is (Australian Business Number). An Australian Business Number (ABN) is a unique 11-digit number that identifies your business to the government. So, after answering a few key questions I was informed that I didn’t need an ABN number (despite some emails indicating otherwise) I wonder when those ATO agents were young and in school did they dream that one day they would be educated and informing people about the joys of paying taxes and applying for ABN numbers? Late afternoon I emailed the person at whose suggestion it was that I needed an ABN my invoice, along with a statement of supplier form.

TUESDAY

After the ABN drama was finally behind me. I’m making it sound like an episode of the real housewives of Beverley Hills. Where each episode they take an innocent conversation and have a yelling and shouting profanity match about it and then make up over drinks. Whereas in reality it was on someone’s advice that I telephoned the ATO and spoke to them to get clarification. I certainly don’t want this to be bought up in the inevitable 3-part reunion special. I caught up with a mate at a coffee shop, I prayed that there were no cameras to record our conversation and then broadcast it to the nation or that at the reunion Andy Cohen (the host) would play back what I had said which would lead to accusations, finger pointing, muttered words under the breath and confrontations for a full 20+-minutes. Wherein an announcer would say “tune in tomorrow night for part two of our reunion special”

WEDNESDAY

Just before my email account decided that it needed to take a break from receiving emails for me, I got one from DDWA (Developmental Disability WA) with links to those interviews that I was apart of a few months back. You can read more about that here https://autisticnick.com/2019/06/10/autistic-nck-ddwa-and-the-community-educators-project/ and what DDWA do here https://autisticnick.com/2019/04/01/autistic-nck-volunteers/. The videos are a really great representation and provide an insight to what life is like for those with a disability. When I am given permission to share these interviews I will. After sitting outside with my email account, listening to it’s issues and then saying a thankful prayer we both head back inside and I can get back to answering all those delayed emails.

THURSDAY

On the train again hurtling towards DDWA. The joys of being on a train after 9 am in the morning. Where else can you witness such a wide range of live performers on one train ride. Directly opposite me sits a woman reading a book. Nothing alarming about that I hear you cry, and you’d be right, but this woman for some strange reason is whispering the words as she reads and what we get is an ASMR performance from her book something rabbit. I can’t see the word before the word rabbit which is annoying but anyway, she’s harmless enough. Behind me sits a woman with her headphones on and despite the notices on the train which says to us to keep our music levels down she has ignored this, and I close my eyes and drift off as I am transported to a Bollywood movie (she is listening to Indian music). I step out of my palatial Indian house and then once my boys have gathered around me, we begin to sign and dance to a song about love or wanting a beef korma with onion bhajis for lunch. Sadly, I have a tuna salad for lunch. So, dance or no dance I don’t expect to see a beef korma greeting me anytime soon.

FRIDAY

I find myself as I do every Friday in Aldi wishing that the checkout operators don’t press that button which says repeatedly until the person arrives to switch it off ‘Till 2 is open, would customers please start to unpack their groceries” After the 6^th time I’m like we heard you, but no due to it gaining some self -importance it doesn’t stop bleating out the same message until that person who is operating till number 2 comes along and stops it. I usually wear my noise cancelling headphones (I shouldn’t have to) but until Aldi adopt a quiet hour policy then I am just going to have to put up with it.

SATURDAY

I am thankful for the weekend, it’s a time when you can just lounge about in your pj’s until whatever time you like. You can watch trashy TV, or soppy movies. But it’s a day when you don’t have to do much to enjoy your day. Saturday’s and Sunday’s are great. This week I have finished watching (I didn’t binge watch it either) Fargo the TV series on Netflix. I am now on Season 2 as of last night. If you enjoy dark comedy dramas, then this is the one for you.

SUNDAY

Sunday is just as lazy as Saturday is to be honest. And I am embracing it fully!

Carry on the Conversation

As always, I can also be found on Twitter: @AutisticNick9 and at my email autisticnick9@gmail.com

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Thank you for reading and I will see you next time for more thoughts from across the spectrum.