Autistic Nick, The PT and The Flooded Utility Room

This week I stood on a balcony overlooking the sea pondering a difficult decision.

A rose ceremony was taking place later and I had to eliminate someone with whom I felt that I hadn’t had a connection with.

There were three people left, two would be let go and the last person would be the one that I would declare my undying love to, dropping to my knees I would produce a ring (probably bought from cash converters) and ask for their hand in marriage.

As the waves crash and I am left alone with my thoughts, background music is being played out which is for the benefit of the audience.

The task here is for the music to reflect my emotions as varied as they are to the millions watching at home.

I must not speak a single word, by convey what I am thinking via a range of facial expressions.

It’ll be these expressions that I am conveying that will inform the audience of my decision. I feel like I am on the set of the bold and the beautiful.

I am not. I am standing on a balcony inside a rented beach side villa.

This home is worth around $4 million.

It can be rented for $200 an hour.

But who to let go? I didn’t have the luxury of asking social media users their opinion in an online poll.

Rather I would have to base it on the behaviours of the contestants taking part, when filming ceases and I’m watching it back at home only then would I see that I had probably made the wrong decision as I was being handed the hummus to dip my carrot sticks in before going on a 45-minute walk.

Ok wait, sorry I think I’ve been writing about the Bachelor (a reality TV show) instead of what’s been happening to me this week.

My week had less decision making but certainly there was drama!

MONDAY

Monday are like opening the fridge and finding that all you have in there is cold parsnips and half a tub of dip and panicking because you have friends coming over for a last-minute BBQ that you hastily arranged after watching a cooking show on the TV.

Parsnips like Monday’s are unwelcoming, cold, bland and unadventurous in life.

Monday’s only exist to remind us that there’s four days before it finally reaches Friday once more.

TUESDAY

I am preparing myself for my first PT appointment tomorrow at 10.15 AWST time. I’m nervous. But I am focused on weight loss goals and practising fake facial expressions when it comes to certain exercises bringing my joy like lunges or squats or burpees.

See how much fun doing a burpee is?

No because they are not fun, they are the devils work within the exercise world and only sadists actually enjoy performing them on a regular basis.

WEDNESDAY

Today is the day! I arrive at Danielle’s home. I am early this is a good sign and a good start to the session. We have a brief chat. Danielle then starts to chat about what measurements she is going to need to take in order to work out an exercise plan for me.

I have my weight taken, my height, my skin is measured, then my waist, my hips and thighs all get to be measured and recorded.

It’s then onto flexibility.  How flexible am I? It turns out that I am quite flexible.

Then we go and do a work out.

By the end I have signed up for an app which will record all my food, and liquid intake and joined her Facebook page and handed over the $50 for the hour.

I leave full of hope less $50.

THURSDAY

I had just finished the difficult crossword in the Times newspaper when I thought that I heard a scream or someone yelling?

I sat there in my study but couldn’t hear anything.

I then thought I heard it again moments later.

I got up from my Italian leather desk chair and walked towards the study door and opened it.

It was my mum.

I hurried towards her, had she come to the same conclusion as I had reached about my partner that I had chosen on the Bachelor? Sorry I’m not on that bloody show!

Anyway, I reach the utility room. My mum is all wet.

I looked puzzled.

She opens the door.

Boiling hot water is spraying out at 100k’s an hour! (It’s probably more but that’s what I thought at the time!)

She asks me to help her.

I rush in and begin trying to turn the taps, each way and nothing.

Mum lays down some thick towels to try and soak up the now flooded utility room floor.

I ran next door, grab our neighbour and head back inside.

She turns the taps and hey presto the water stops.

My glasses are fogged up.

We begin the mopping up process.

The neighbour mentions the dreaded P word.

It takes over half an hour to mop and dry the utility room floor.

We check the washing machine by placing the wet towels inside to spin.

No water spays out. We are safe. A plumber’s wages are now down for the day all because we didn’t need his/her services.

FRIDAY

Go shopping at Aldi, encounter the dreaded multiple calls for someone to come to till 3 or 4. Nothing exciting ever happens on Friday apart from me recording my food and drink intake.

I settle down for the night in front of Netflix and a new drama staring Toni Collette.

By the time that I am in bed I have watched 2 episodes of this limited series.

There is a reason that this show is a limited series.

The structure, the dialogue, the acting are all meh.

Something strange that I have noticed about Toni Collette is that wherever she is having a conversation with someone either inside or out one of her ear is red. Like burning red.

The type of red that you turn when you are embarrassed.

Maybe she should get it checked out by a team of specialists?

SATURDAY

Today I did a 45-minute walk in order to boost my exercise goals and to get some fresh air into my lungs.

That night I watched another 2 episodes of this show staring Toni Collette.

So far, I am not impressed. I think I know who the serial rapist is. (Don’t worry I won’t be sharing any spoilers here) it’s only a guess at this stage and I don’t want to say it’s xxxx and then everyone’s like hey don’t spoil it for us!

 

SUNDAY

I went on another 45-minute walk in order to boost my exercise goals and to get some fresh air into my lungs. I feel great and relaxed. Thus, my week has ended.

No more taps or washing machine disasters to encounter!

Carry on the Conversation

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Thank you for reading and I will see you next time for more thoughts from across the spectrum.